By Eddie Mayrose
Gil Lock Goes AWOL
It was a strange week in the Lock household as husband Gil struggled not only with his own ineptitude but his wife, Jill’s, continued success. We tried on numerous occasions to contact Gil and get his selections for this week but he just wasn’t talking. After a number of calls went unreturned, we turned to Jill for some answers.
“He’s shot this week”, said Mrs. Lock. “It’s worse than the last time he pulled an ohfer. At least, then, he didn’t have his wife looking over his shoulder with an 11-4 record.” “He’s been down all week and breaks out in a sweat at the mere mention of College Football.” When asked how the CollegeSportsView would eventually get Gil’s picks, Jill proposed an alternative solution. “Our nephew, Padraig; (they call him Pad), is in from Ireland. He’s completely taken with American Football and thinks he can do better than Gil. Hell, he can’t do worse.”
So, while we’re still worried about Gil Lock’s state of mind, we’ve a column to write. Here are Jill Lock’s Week 9 prognostications along with those of her nephew, Pad Lock. Enjoy and good luck.
Locks of the Week
Jill Lock’s Picks
Nevada-26.5 over Hawaii
– Nevada has been very good to me during its four game winning streak and is probably the reason Gil won’t play this week as their 70 point performance vs. Idaho was his third and last flop. Hawaii stinks, Nevada’s hot and I love saying the quarterback’s name. Colin Kaepernick. Colin Kaepernick.
Boise State -33 over San Jose State
– Think Boise was pissed at the BCS ratings this week? Their only shot to bounce back is to score 100 points a week and hope others lose. Besides, their head coach is such a cutie. Do they still have the running back that proposed to his girlfriend at the Fiesta Bowl? Love that.
Missouri – 4 over Colorado
– It’s not unusual, (I love Tom Jones), for a head coach to bench his quarterback during a bad season. But his own son? That’s what Colorado’s Dan Hawkins did so, I’m picking Missouri because Hawkins is such a mean dad.
Pad Lock’s Picks
Ohio State-New Mexico State Over 47.5
– This is the kind of improperly valued line that my Uncle Gil taught me to look for. Ohio State is favored by 39.5 but the Over/Under is just 8 points higher. All you should need is one score from New Mexico State.
North Texas-Western Kentucky Over 66.5
– Here’s another one I learned from Uncle Gil. It’s a matter of a special math he uses called, Arifemetic. The formula is to add up the average points allowed by each team and compare to the Over/Under. So, using his method, North Texas allows 38 PPG and Western Kentucky 42 PPG. Add them together and you get, like, 95 or something which is, like 50 points more than 66.5. Take the over.
Cincinnati- 14.5 over Syracuse
Season Record- 18-14-1